In This Episode
Episode Summary:
In this episode, we explore the strategic benefits of using Private Caucuses during mediation. When emotions run high or sensitive topics arise, a Private Caucus provides a safe, confidential space to have honest discussions with the mediator. We’ll also walk through a real-life example of how Private Caucuses helped a divorcing couple navigate a difficult issue—introducing new relationships to their children. This episode sheds light on how private sessions can lead to breakthroughs and agreements that might otherwise be impossible in joint discussions.
Key Points Covered:
- What is a Private Caucus?
- A confidential, one-on-one session between you and the mediator, used in in-person mediation sessions.
- Private Caucuses allow you to speak more freely and work through tough emotions without worrying about the other party’s reactions.
- How a Private Caucus Works:
- These sessions are scheduled during mediation to address sensitive issues in a private setting.
- Private Caucuses are not used in Shuttle Mediation, where parties stay in separate rooms the entire time.
- The mediator gathers information, explores concerns, and helps guide the negotiation forward based on what’s shared in these private sessions.
- Benefits of Private Caucus:
- Confidentiality: You can explore sensitive topics, vent emotions, and brainstorm solutions without judgment or escalation.
- Insight & Strategy: The mediator uses the information from private discussions to help prepare for obstacles, propose solutions, and coach you on how to present proposals effectively.
- Communication Coaching: Private Caucuses offer some coaching on how to approach sensitive issues and communication challenges in joint sessions.
- Real Client Story:
- A wife wanted to introduce a Morality Clause, asking that neither spouse introduce new relationships to their children during the first 90 days. When her husband resisted and revealed he was already seeing someone, emotions ran high.
- In a Private Caucus with the husband, it emerged that unresolved anger from an affair was fueling his resistance. The mediator helped him see how their actions impacted their children, leading him to agree to the Morality Clause and delay introducing his new partner.
- This shift in mindset, from focusing on personal grievances to prioritizing the children’s well-being, helped both spouses move toward a more cooperative co-parenting relationship.
- When to Request a Private Caucus:
- Either you or the mediator can request a Private Caucus when sensitive issues arise that need to be discussed outside the joint session.
- It’s especially useful in medium-to-high conflict situations or when emotional or personal struggles come into play.
Conclusion:
Private Caucuses offer a powerful way to address sensitive topics and reduce conflict in mediation. By providing a safe space for confidential discussions, these sessions can lead to breakthroughs that move negotiations forward, helping you get closer to a fair resolution.
Next Episode Preview:
In the next episode, we’ll dive into Parenting Plans—what you need to know and how to prepare effectively for mediation to ensure your children’s best interests are at the forefront.
Length: 24:41
Size: 48MB
Season: 2024
Episode: 09
Series: Pro Se Mediation Boot Camp
Now What?
- Learn More about Family Synergy Mediation here: https://myfamilymediation.com
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- On Spotify here: https://open.spotify.com/show/48W4evUkM5kqxAT73LrRsY?si=18999b16ef984434
- On Apple Podcasts here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/divorce-mediation-journal/id1763072291